The following was written by the late Stephen McIntyre and appeared in Andrew Schmidt's fanzine Ha Ha Ha.
Stephen – University student: likes Camel cigarettes, cups of tea and vegetarian meals. Favourite TV program is The Prisoner (the English one not the Aussie soap). Musical tastes range from jazz to The Beatles to Jefferson Airplane to The Residents to The Birthday Party and back again.
Mark – Adult school pupil taking 7th form art. Also likes Camel cigarettes and cups of tea. Really likes Callan. Loves The Birthday Party, UK Decay, Chrome and The Sex Pistols.
Scott – University student training to be a forestry worker (god help us all). Likes drinking beer and chewing his fingernails. General habit is getting extremely nervous and fidgety. Drinks lots of coffee (white, no sugar). Likes The Fall, Birthday Party and U2. Drives a motorcar (very handy). Also smokes.
Matthew – Tech student taking graphic design (did both Ballon D’Essai EP covers). Doesn’t smoke, drinks bulk coffee (white, two sugars), adores The Fall religiously, as well as Pere Ubu, The Birthday Party and The Residents. Has freckles.
Lyndon – Don’t really know much about Lyndon. Likes Earl Grey tea and Benson and Hedges cigarettes. Loves Throbbing Gristle and The Birthday Party. Also has a particular fondness for Rachel. Has long hair.